Reading through my goals for 2018 below, I am not exactly on the a good trajectory. In other words I have been really fucking useless. It was after I came across this blog post that I decided to get my ass in gear. So as I sit here with a glass of wine and some chocolate i’m finally getting around to doing blog post number 3 out of the 20 I want to do before year close.
I’m feeling kinda funny the last few days. I just finished a novel, which is a strange occurrence in itself given I have exclusively read non-fiction for the last few years. The novel was Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami. It’s essentially a love story but the way he wrote really resonated. After reading the book one night, I had very vivid dream where I was having sex with a guy that I have a huge crush on.. but in the dream the emotions where so intense; I would go as far to say I was in love with him.
Now this is strange for me as it’s been so long since I felt a romantic love for someone that I was doubting my own memories of ever being in love and even the idea of love itself. But after that dream (three days ago now) I can still bring up the feelings and it’s again letting me believe there is a little more magic in the world than I’ve been accustomed to thinking recently. So thanks I guess Murakami.
In terms of the guy I had the dream about, I don’t imagine there will any love story on that front. I have embarrassed myself too many times in my behavior around him. We also now live about a 25 hour flight from each other. Not to mention the bittersweet final communication between us which I still can’t understand. So the guy was on holidays and we had messaged a bit, then he asked if when he got back I would like to go for a drink with him. I was over the moon with this and thought it would finally be the opportunity to show him my best side..so I said yes and asked some stupid follow up question about his holiday. In response to this he blocked me on the platform we were messaging over and I haven’t heard anything in over a year. So yea. Peace out.
Get in touch with me at michael@stoicjournal.com or drop a comment below.
Read through your post, want to share something you already know.
Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens. – Epictetus
Thanks for the reminder